05.19.08

Random thoughts…

Posted in Love in the shape of a heart, Wet Wellingtons at 7:42 pm by AnN

     White pollen floated by like little spring snowflakes. My hair brushed across my face as the breeze slowly gently carressed my soft red cheeks. My tears welled up lining the corner of my eyes. I straighten my leg acrosss the bench as I sat there underneath the rays of the 6pm sun.

     I wandered long and far on the street, no where to go and with no one in my mind. Where do you go during times like this? Whom should I turn to during times like this?In my mind, I seeked a quiet place where i’ll be anonymous beneath the leafy green roof, warm kisses from the summer sun and soft spring breeze to tame the rapidness of my beating heart.I can still taste the saltiness of my tears at the tips of my tongue.

    I sat up watching this little beauties tip-tapping across the wooden ground. Their everlasting laughter filled my heart with sweetness and those innocent eyes….those innocent eyes i wonder at what age whould they start to lose them. Can the innocence not remained? or are they doomed to submit to the cruelty of the society?

     I have so many words to say,so many things in my mind but to write them all down seems almost impossible but I scribbled it all down letting the words slowly seeped out from the blue ink pen smeared in tears. I let it out randomly not worrying about continuation from the sentence before because the words randomly place on the piece of paper is just like how mess-up my mind is right now.

     I looked over my left shoulder and I long to be close to the waters. Maybe, just maybe the calmness of the lake will influence my emotions to remain calm. Maybe the water will dissolve thie tears lingering down and bring out the sun in me once again. I popped a piece of chocolate into my mouth. The hazelnut cream kisses my lips but it seems plainly tasteless. All I feel is bitterness choking me and I can hardly breathe. My tears continue to seep out of the corner of my eyes even drizzling down the tip of my nose, as i continue scribbling across the page. The sun reflects off my shades but I still feel the chill leftover by the harsh winter. Goosebumps are forming on my leg and little white flowers tickle me as if telling me to smile once more.

     I don’t want to be sad or to ever cry. I don’t want to be hurt or dissapointed. Can those emotions remained hidden or buried away? Can I not be protected or shield from  any of them? Can people around me stop going through difficulties because of me? Can I not stop troubling people around me? I want to share this feelings I am going through, I want to talk it all out but it is so difficult. For years, I fight my own wars. I go through so many things alone and for me to speak out now seems so difficult. How do you share when all this years you walk through the wilderness alone? How can you ask for help when you climb the volcano alone for all this years?

     I guess I am still in flesh… i guess I am only human and there are all essential to be part of a mortal’s heart. I have to just simply learn to grow with it, simply learn to adapt to them and just walk the feelings all off during times in which I cannot withstand…

     ——————————————————————-

IF IN LOVE LIKE THEM…

Very sweet korean drama staring the very beautiful, highest paid actress/singer LEE HYO RI and LEE DONG GUN

Its about this two very sick people falling in love…and its just cute:-) through this drama, I learn how fame and riches cannot match up with the sincerity of one’s heart. You can be happy with just living in a quiet village with nothing other than simplicity when you are with people who care about you,who are like your family and the one who loves you more than anything in the world. and because he loves her, he tried his best and he fight through it all…he did his very best to fulfill her one and only dream….I guess life can be really simple if you have the courage to pursue what truly matters instead of the materialistic things we chase in our daily life…

Not too bad…really not too bad….if you have time…yeah watch it:)

the song is entitled SCOLDED by LEE HYO RI…with english sub…the ending of the drama…

 

 

3 Comments »

  1. amyksy said,

    Feeling sad and sorrow is sometimes inevitable. but we should look at the brighter side of life. Lingering in the pool of sadness is not going to make you any better. you’re strong.
    you still have your friends.

    cheer up girl.. :)

  2. Vaughn said,

    hey tat song is so sweet and touching… really moves my heart… it helps me to have another reason to treasure live and grow stronger… ^^

  3. V anonoymous said,

    If you feel sad, do what it takes to be happy, but never never NEVER forget.


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